Baby Talk its fun but is it Hurting my Child? How to teach your child to talk.

Baby Talk Does it Help or HURT my family.

This segment will analyze the idea of “Baby Talk”. This is in regards to the cute fun way parents and other family members basically dummy down their speech when speaking to a child. Don’t get me wrong I realize that baby talk is Fun and usually puts a smile on the face of the one expressing it. But THAT is ALL it does. In fact it is my belief that baby talking to your young child can actually cause more harm than good. This writing will go over the value in not just being honest with your children and family but looking at every conversation as a learning opportunity for you and your child and or family.

At birth your child is a fleshy version of Johnny 5 from short circuit. By that I mean all they want is INPUT. Like little computers fresh out of the box they are full of capabilities. But like that same computer fresh out of the box they require the Software (Knowledge) do be able to utilize those capabilities. You wouldn’t intentionally load defective or in any way Broken or incorrect software would you? The same should be said for the programming (Teaching, raising) your child. You might be thinking oh well it’s just all in fun, my cute awesome little child sounds so cute the way he or she says that word. When smiling and laughing is the result we sometimes forget that he or she is “Learning” so when she or he says that word in that incorrect,, funny, or cute way, it’s a little deeper than you realize. You see that little computer is doing a lot more than just saying a funny sounding word. The child is first of attempting to communicate, a very important corner stone to human education. The child is trying to convey a thought or idea. Even though when we baby talk we are intending to make a smile. In some ways parents often feel that by baby talking we are accommodating the fact that they are learning. But the child is trying also to improve their ability to communicate. From the perspective of the child your response solidifies whether or not they have succeeded. You see when they say a word incorrectly they then look to the parent or other adult for acceptance and approval. And when you respond with an excited smile, phonetically. Repeating the dummy downed word they feel that is a success. Don’t take this the wrong way, we are not talking about discouraging the child, when you acknowledge that you understand the Idea, thought, or question the child is trying to convey with that same excited smile you say the word correctly, the child is just as happy. Now you have acknowledged what the child was correct about in the statement and also taught the child the Correct way. No this little computer full of excitement has successfully communicated; the child has learned a little more which is appreciated making the child happier. As you grow with your child this will build a bond of trust as well. The subconscious retains a lot of info, and instead of spending years teaching your child something that you will expect them KNOW is wrong only a couple years later can undermine trust. However being straight and realizing that your child is ALWAYS learning will remove that question and solidify that mom or dad can be trusted. This touches on the little white lies, something that will be covered in depth later. All the benefits to Not “Baby Talking” to your child are all equally important, for me this next benefit was the reason I wouldn’t baby talk. This was the reason I explained to my family not to baby talk my children. As was stated before our children are like little computers. Searching all day for input. Now early in life there is much we do not understand, we are learning. From birth we are learning, we learn facts, ideas, Processes, and everything else in our lives. When I child asks a question for instance “why does it get Dark at night” there are many different ways a parent might answer this question. I would answer it starting out with, “well the world we live in is actually a Ball, and like our world the sun is a ball. Our world is spinning so half the time the light from the sun shines on half of the ball while the other half remains in darkness, so right now do you think our part of the world is facing the sun or facing away from it? That may seem like an extreme example but it’s not. Even if the child is too young to understand you have filled its mind with facts that are now there and ready as the child’s brain acquires even more input as life goes on. You have also just intrigued the child, we have no idea what wonderful or weird ideas the child had previous to asking this question but now the child’s mind is filled with more wonders to consider and learn. It was my experience doing this with my children that in most cases doing this as the example above would start a discussion that would last from 2 minutes to several hours. These resulting discussions you have the child’s intrigue and complete attention, and again even if they can’t understand it all their minds are absorbing the facts and information and the brain can retrieve and compare this information at a later date. I argued this with my family when my children were toddlers; however it wasn’t long until they got older and consistently amazed their teachers and people around them as the stock piles of years’ worth of information come pouring out increasing the problem solving capabilities. I’m still amazed as my children become teenagers when I can see this take place. This also takes us back to one of the earlier benefits, Trust.  Both consciously and subconsciously the brain associates the early information learned from you is still correct later in life. But every time the brain has to overwrite your basically have to change it makes a note that information was unreliable. Let’s compound that figure all the childish answers and Baby talk statements made in a day times 365 days times several years, there will be a LOT incorrect information that needs to be changed. That takes up effort and time, where as if the correct response were given in the first place instead of correcting wrong ideas the child would be standing Proud on a foundation of trust with a bank of information confident that it is correct. The ladder situation is the starting point for problem solving whereas the baby talk is a great starting point for confusion. Yes it really means that much when your child reaches out or speaks to you they are engaging you to learn about this world it is actually quite rude when you think about it to give back a childish response. The child isn’t smiling because of the Baby Talk, they are smiling because you are, they are smiling because you’re engaging them and they love you, they are smiling because they are too young to realize that you’re not taking them seriously and are misleading them to believing they have accomplished something they haven’t.

The idea here is not to know everything but share the real knowledge you have. Answer the questions they ask as completely and thoroughly as possible. You never know what statement you make that will spark their imagination so send them all you can. Saying words the cute way actually delays their learning. They want to sound like you, show them how. Pronounce the words correctly and be proud when your child astounds you to how quickly the ability to communicate grows not just the child but the whole family.

                There are always questions we don’t for one reason or another we don’t want to answer. Do Not Lie to your family. Again this is one of those things people believe can’t be avoided. But it can and it is easy once you realize TWO things. One Love and Trust go hand in hand, don’t lie to those you love. And Two you don’t have to answer every question, by that I mean it is completely ok to say “I don’t feel you would understand so I’m not going to answer that right now.” Or “ There are times and places for everything and we will go over this at another time” or “ Honey some things you have to wait until you’re a little older, I’m proud of you and yes you are very smart now, but something can only be understood with experience. I have done this and Believe it or not it quickly becomes accepted. By accepted I mean the children learn that, that is the end of that question for now, and it builds trust. You are teaching the child One, that you are honest and will refuse a response before deceiving the child, (Which shows the child that you value your word, and that you respect them and their ideas. Two it teaches them to be honest even when it may seem difficult, and children learn by imitating those in the surrounding area they look up to. Would you rather give them an Honest role model, or teach them Very early on to lie when it makes the situation easier?

 Follow this link for more help on words that bring a family together. Learn how to raise your children without your kids telling you No.

Healthy Human Habits Saying Yes to Life, Keeping your kids positive

 http://healthyhumanhabitslifeplant.blogspot.com/2015/06/say-yes-to-life-one-simple-way-to.html

Tips to a Happy Healthy Home

How to teach my son or daughter to talk
Using this technique proved its value when my son and I made this

Rob Zane